Needs
👉 Here’s a summary of what we covered:
➡️ All humans share a set of basic needs – for survival, safety, community, and self development
➡️ We feel pleasure when we meet our needs, and pain when we don’t
Our personalities are formed by learning to repeat behaviors (reward) that lead to pleasure and avoid behaviors that cause pain (punishment)
➡️ Our brains prioritize needs based on how urgent they are, and how important they are to our survival
It’s hard to plan for the future when we’re worried about surviving today
It’s hard to build trust, intimacy and empathy, when we don’t feel like there’s enough resources to go around
It’s hard to explore the best version of ourselves, when we’re conserving resources for survival and safety
➡️ Homeostasis is the biological process that allows us to stay in healthy range for our needs
When our brains need us to act to meet our needs, we experience specific, conscious feelings (interoception) that motivate us to meet our specific physical needs, social and emotional needs
➡️ Our thoughts tell us what’s happening in the world, while our feelings add color to those thoughts so we know what that means for us, and we can act accordingly.
If most of our behavior is governed by these internal processes to meet our needs, it becomes incredibly important to understand what we need and how those needs are driving us consciously or unconsciously. But honestly, it’s hard to even know what we need to begin with.
In the next chapter, we’ll discuss how feelings and emotions act as signals to guide behavior, and how we might back into what we need by listening to our feelings and what needs they’re motivating us to meet.
🤔 Reflection Questions Recap:
Do you feel like you’re stuck on any particular rung of Maslow’s pyramid? If so, which one?
Does your brain feel safe enough to trust and depend on others? If not, what’s compromising your sense of safety?
What behavior do you find yourself doing a lot, even though you don’t want to? What reward are you getting from that behavior?
Take a moment right now to pause and tune into your own interoception. What do you feel right now inside your body? Do you want anything in particular? What need is your body motivating you to go meet?
Think about the last time you felt a strong emotion, or really were aware of how you were feeling. What was the situation? What thoughts led to that feeling? Was the thought a fact or a belief? What did you do when you felt that way to get your needs met?
Questions on how to apply these concepts to your own life? Take the next step.
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